Trendy Kendy

Taylor Kendrick, widely referred to as Trendy Kendy, is a spaz….unless he takes his pills; then he’s just boring. To put it simply Tuhrendi has Tuhrets. Trendy stormed onto the SYA scene on August 28, 2010 as the “nice guy” in his pink shorts, pastel yellow Ralph Lauren button down, and loafers. He quickly showed his sick sense of humor when he tossed out nicknames for other SYAers such as Beauber. After pretending to be an innocent boy for about a week, the real Taylor Kendrick lashed out periodically as he started to yell at people for no reason. Over a class trip to Terracina, Taylor’s true colors were shown as he sprinted down the shore in a black Speedo, and later on when he skinny dipped in the Mediterranean Sea. Lauren and Alice came to know Trendy much better on this class trip when they visited with him in a cave. Trendy had not taken any pills that day, so when he arrived there he went insane. Between making up the famous fist pound, grabbing himself (see photo below), and climbing into sketchy holes he proved himself to be a true Roman warrior. After orientation, Trendy was lost and confused when he returned to Viterbo to find that the weather was much colder. Shivering in his unfit summer clothes, he ran into a pizzeria. At this point in the school year, Taylor’s Italian vocabulary was very limited so as he pointed at the piece of pizza he wanted, he shouted, “un un un un un!!” 

        
           One of Taylor Kendrick’s favorite past times is stalking himself on facebook, and telling people the story behind every single photo. Alice and Lauren also enjoy this activity, because his pictures from sophomore year show the transformation of Taylor going from being a catepillar to a butterfly. A good friend Beauber discusses Taylor’s past saying, “Look, it’s goat child” (See picture below). Taylor Kendrick also loves to talk about his friends. Our personal favorites are Broseidon and Birdsong. When not prowling the town in his suede jacket, Taylor makes plans for Christmas break when he will return back to New Orleans. Taylor has planned what outfit he will wear at his first party, and what he will say when he enters: “It’s fucking Taylor Kendrick from Italy! What’s up bitches? Come stai???” 

Goat Child at play.

Learning the basics for sya...

        
          In his free time, Taylor plays the video game Total War alone in his room, or sometimes with Beauber. He even set the language to Italian so he could pick up a few new words to add to his Italian vocabulary of about 10 words. He also enjoys watching Mary Kate and Ashley movies on the regular, his favorites being Holiday in the Sun and Our Lips are Sealed. He can even quote the lead guys, and admires their ways with the ladies. For example, Taylor loves to imitate Griffin from Holiday in the Sun by randomly going up to people and saying, “Everyone has a hobby, you’re mine”, and the occasional Jordan quote: “Has anyone ever told you you’re amazing? Has anyone ever told you that I am going to kiss you?” 


           Taylor loves his hair, and he loves to brag about how gorgeous it is. Except apparently his current haircut makes him look like a five year old, so he is getting it cut soon. Another interesting Taylor fact is that he thinks he is a cat. A close friend, girl Taylor states, “He kitty nudges you with his face.” One of his favorite vocabulary words happens to be “rawr”. 
            

laughing at hair

         
       Taylor also thought he was very funny during the first several weeks of school. He ordered a full body suit from America to arrive in Italy with the intentions of giving his friends a good laugh. He surprised Beau, Alice and many others multiple times on skype video chat wearing his suit. Ironically, no one found the suit to be even remotely funny, except the fact that he would buy one in the first place. Here are several screenshots from his video chat with Alice:

 
           
          During the first two months of SYA, Taylor was going for “Bad Boy/I don’t care” attitude in order to get ladies. He was quite successful as he landed ---- on September 22nd at the SYA orientation in Terracina. They were in love. Then later, after a dramatic break up with ---, Taylor had a quick and spicy HU with ---- on Halloween night. 
          
           Taylor also thinks he is destined for success. He keeps saying how he was meant to be put with Alice’s host family. “I’m fucking Taylor Kendrick. My family should feed me gold.” He also told Alice’s host family this past weekend that he wants them to adopt him because they make the best food. To get across this message to the family, Taylor pointed at a piece of food and said “Best, best”. I think they got the message. 
           
          At times Trendy Kendy can be kind of sketchy. Alice has often discovered from her little sister, Julia that Taylor has skyped her and said “don’t worry, you’re Taylor Lautner is out there somewhere, you just have to find him”. 
          
          All fun and games is over when Taylor takes his pills though. He becomes nonresponsive and bitchy. He sucks then.


        
        

          Taylor also has a hormonal hair-growth disorder. At 18 years old he is yet to grow any hair on his arms and has shaved only once just for fun. When confronted with this, Taylor often replies that this means he is not yet done growing. No Taylor. False. You have stopped growing. Your not going to grow one inch more and face it, you have a hormonal hair-growth disorder. 



           Taylor also thinks he is wickedly smart. He strides out of every history exam, usually 15 minutes later because of his extra time, telling everyone that he is positive he aced the test. He claims that a vast knowledge of geography is all you need to succeed in Ancient History, and thus he spends the majority of his time playing Total War and naming all the countries onwww.sporcle.com. 


          While Taylor misses New Orleans (his status on facebook was once “what the fuck am I doing here?”) he is excited to travel across Italy for the spring semester of his senior year. Hopefully he will know how to form a sentence in Italian by then. 

Alice and Lauren with THE one and only Trendy Kendy.

NEXT TIME: REED EDWARD BRUCE, y'all get ready now