“Naw, I’m not tryna do that” is a common phrase heard by SYA’s very own Reed Bruce. Reed is one of the few southerners at SYA (Alice too), and he likes to make this fact known frequently. As a result of his constant exaggeration of his southern accent, SYA English teacher, Erica Berry, now ridicules the south everyday in class. Taylor Kendrick (New Orleans) and Alice (Tennessee) do not find this representation of the South amusing at all.
The first week of SYA Reed Bruce was a major gal pal. That is until he met up with a fellow SYA boy, MichaelJAM at the white couches. Ever since then, they have been best friends. During the Macchina di Santa Rosa festival, Reed and Michael stirred up some drama at a bookstore. They read a lot about Long Island, New York. Let’s just say Tholcomb and Alice were victimized, and the bookstore was not very happy with Reed’s behavior. The week after that Reed formed the WOLF PACK. Reed founded this group of 3 SYA boys when he realized that there were very few guys in the program. This pack included Christopher “Chance” Rodriguez, Michaeljam Stapleton, and Reed liked to think of himself as the pack’s ring leader. The wolfpack frequented Shuren Minds gym, and gossiped in the gym locker rooms. They even bought matching briefcases. You could say Reed was living the life. Everyday he dined at the luxurious mensa under the shade of the umbrellas at the outdoor tables, after school he lifted weights, and he relaxed at the infamous “watering hole” after an intense workout. However, Reed’s bliss would not last forever.
FUN TIMES AT THE BOOKSTORE
WOLF PACK
WHITE COUCHES--SCENE OF ALL CRIMES
WATERING HOLE Let’s look more closely now at the relationship between Reed and Ms. Berry. From the first day of English class back in September, Lauren and Alice knew right off the bat that Reed was not one of her favorite students. One day in class after a classic Reed moment, Ms. Berry approached him saying, “Reed, do you know how transparent you are? Its like looking at an xray” and another favorite quote “Reed you are an ass, do you know that? You are an ass.” Reed finally broke down one day during a class trip to the computer lab. After once again being scolded by Ms. Berry, Reed suddenly went silent and stormed off to the boy’s bathroom. Alice and Lauren had assumed that he was silently crying among the urinals, but Reed proved to be more of a man than that. He slowly regained his confidence in the English classroom. Today in class Ms. Berry asked Reed what the highlight of his Christmas break was. Reed responded, “Oh I have a highlighter”. Speaking of Reed in the classroom, today in Ancient History when Sammartino (sp?) was explaining some important facts from the life of Alexander the Great, Reed obviously confused from this overload of information cried out, “Why? Its confusing!” Though Reed likes to act out in class, he is actually a good student.
Now, moving onto Reed’s many looks over the past 4 months we will first examine his hair. An anonymous SYA girl describes Reed’s hair at the beginning of the year saying “It looks like a condom” Since then Reed has let his hair grow out quite a bit. Today in the salone Alice asked him if he was ever going to get a haircut. He replied “Naw I’m just gonna let it get nasty shaggy” How sexy. Also Reed has made some wardrobe adjustments as the weather has changed here in Viterbo. He acquired some Armani khakis and jeans as well as some 10 euro Chinese loafers. For class presentations, when Reed hasn’t felt like he has prepared enough, he likes to dress up in nice clothes (including a tie). He feels that even though he doesn’t fully know the material for a class, a tie will make up for everything.
SHORT HAIRCUT Reed is definitely part of the Happy People clique at SYA. He goes around hugging people randomly, usually in the salone, on class field trips, or between classes. Non-happy people have tried to reject these hugs. One time Alice shouted at Reed saying “I am not that happy!” and Reed said “You are just going to have to accept my hugs, because they aren’t going away” Before going in for a hug Reed’s signature line is “Show me some love” One strategy of Alice and Lauren’s on avoiding these hugs is to slowly back away from him and pretend like they didn’t hear him.
TAKING A BREAK FROM BEING HAPPY While Alice and Lauren have never personally witnessed Reed’s dancing skills, they have friends who have. Friend Helen describes Reed’s dancing as “hoedown meets Justin Bieber” Close friend Michaeljam says, “I’ve never seen it, but I am very jealous”
Now we will examine Reed’s lingo. Common phrases heard by this southern gentleman are:
- “I got mad love for you”
- “I might could”
- “Hailll naw”
- “ciao bella”
- “wait this one’s good numero numero…69”
- “fatto”
- “this one time in Alabama….”
- “I’m the first person from Alabama to take the SAT”
YOUNG REEDReed’s signature move is his heel click. He will randomly run ahead of a group of people just to show off his heel click. The first week of school, during an afternoon in the countryside, Reed showed his heel click to Alice and Emilie Trehue. He said, “See y’all are being all polite now cause you don’t know me well, but all my friends at home say I am retarded”.
Before getting to SYA, Reed knew very little about the college application process. At the first senior advisory meeting Reed said, “Wait we have to write an essay?” and he still wasn’t quite sure about where he wanted to go. University of Alabama was calling his name but he knew in his heart that he should try to get out of his comfort zone. Speaking about the University of Alabama, Reed has a whole collection of photos on his iphone from his tour of the rival school, Auburn. He even had the privilege to go up into a clock tower on the school’s campus.
Though Reed has traveled great distances from Hoover, Alabama he will always be an Alabama boy at heart. Now we leave you with this quote:
“Y’all I might could do that” No Reed, that is not correct English.
NEXT UP ON SYA BOYS BLOG: EJ EIRAS-SAUNDERS/EDGEY/EDGES/ERNEST JOSE/ALICE’S FUTURE HUSBAND
